“As I breathe is how I perceive. What I perceive is what I receive.” ~ Ed Harrold
One of the 8 limbs of yoga is mindful breathing. There is not a single bad thing about mindful breathing. On the contrary, the high-level list of benefits fills a page in our yoga teacher training manual. I sort of intellectually knew this to be true, but I had never practiced mindful breathing until about a year ago, when I found myself in a meditation class mostly by default and ended up really enjoying it.
Pema Chodron, the Buddhist monk whose writings I’ve been delving into lately, has quite a lot to say about breathing. I am learning from her about Tonglen practice (which Pema describes beautifully in this post). In short, Tonglen is a form of mindful breathing where you breathe IN pain, suffering, struggle, fear—and you breathe OUT pain-soothing relief.
This approach is antithetical to other messages I recall hearing, like “Let go; just breathe it out; exhale your pain.” Her take surprised me, so I’ve been trying it during short, 10-minute morning meditations to check my own experience of it, and It is making sense to me!
I am a beginner when it comes to learning about Buddhism, but Tonglen is an example of exactly what I appreciate about it and have to learn from studying it: Buddhism is oriented toward what is present and real, simple but not simplistic, generous in intention.
Tonglen exists as a breathing and meditation practice because there IS pain, suffering, and fear - and instead of denying or praying for different, this practice asks us to see it, look at it,drink it in. And then what we exhale and expel is soothing, loving. That is beautiful to me. It reminds me that each of us is capable of processing negativity to ease our own and other’s suffering.
This post reminds me of something Pema says in a teaching series she gave about "Unconditional Confidence". She spoke about fear and how in order to get past fear, to not live fearfully, we cannot just ignore it, we have to know it. We have to know it intimately. That was comforting to me because I interpret it as meaning if I am going to feel fear, it is okay, and that I should really feel it in order to move past it. How often we want to skim over the surface and pretend it isn't there, though it is.
ReplyDeleteI'm also very much relating to your resistance to practice meditation. I have found myself a few times the past couple of weeks coming up with the most ridiculous excuses. Which is so funny because I don't need an excuse - I don't have anyone to tell it to. The worst part is that at the very same time, I miss it, I long for it. Asana practice also left me sore, not in a good way, and for the first time in a long time just didn't feel good. It was a strange experience for me. And as I'm writing it is making me realize that right afterwards I caught a virus. So...clearly there is an energy block somewhere and I need to find it.
I think I'll try the meditation you shared, Cyndi. Thanks a bunch. And thanks for allowing me to be a part of your journey. I feel honored.
Hello Dear Carrie,
DeleteYes! This is what I find so lovely about Buddhism in general - the acceptance of all things without judgement - the encouragement to feel everything, yet also look at it from a point of awareness. Hope that virus moved its way right through you, and that it was the cause of your "sore, not in a good way" reaction to asana.
Thanks for joining me on this journey. It makes all the difference to me. :)